My friends and family know that I have not quite chosen the easy road. The combination of being both deeply private and living out loud is not always straight forward for somebody of my intensity. My present unwillingness to compromise adds still yet another flavour, for I have in this path of mine done more than enough experimentation with compromises and slowly have started to realize that whatever short gains compromises bring, these tend to sour in the long run making life more difficult, not easier.
On Saturday afternoon in Berne, I attended the showing of a documentary film “the gift from beate” produced in 2004 and released in 2005 in Japan. I was invited to attend this showing during the Lift07 by Yoshiko Kurisaki who had joined Henriette and I in the creativity workshop.
This film has moved me immensely. It is not a film about women, it is a film about leadership in the struggle for one’s own dignity. This one issue is so close to me that I can hardly bare to think of it without tears coming to my eyes. The film can also be seen as a documentary of Beate Sirota Gordon‘s life and her involvement in the creation of Article 24 of the Japanese constitution, however its scope reaches far beyond that. It really is about human rights.
What does this have to do with me?
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It started when I was eighteen. Now there is a limit to what I am at this point willing to share in public while living out loud, and living out loud I do continue. However there is that that is so very mine and which I have denied myself for so very long, that on discovering it, I am not ready to share it. It is a bit like why most fiction writers never talk about work in progress. Those who know know. Those who know also know how very deep and private I am.